Maybe it’s because of all the dust and book smell I’ve been inhaling consistently for the past six days…
Angelina Jolie I’m most definitely not, but my adorable mug has its share of celebrity resemblances. Here are some of them:
1. “Kamukha mo si Cherie Gil, ayusin mo lang yang pagmumukha mo.”
As Maria Callas. Wait, does this mean I look like Maria Callas too?
According to: My brother, upon seeing a massive Maldita billboard featuring the face of La Gil.
My Reaction: Any association with the fabulosity that is Miss Cherie Gil is very much welcome, so thanks bro, I think I may not rat to dear sister-in-law about your disgusting farting habits not so long ago. And it pleases me no end that I have the face to pull off that immortal You are nothing but a second-rate…C’mon, you know the rest.
2. “Aaay, Mariel Rodriguez ang fez mo, lola!”
According to: My stylist of ten years, the indefatigable Rommel. A dozen other people who watched PBB. Those trio of stylists who worked on me during my brother’s wedding. And almost all the gay parloristas I’ve encountered the past few months.
My reaction: Who? I had no clue who Mariel Rodriguez was until some PBB zealot pushed me towards a TV set while the show was on. Needless to say, I never watched PBB. Although it’s kinda comforting to know that my face is good enough for a hosting stint in a reality show, even if it’s a putrid piece of shit like PBB.
3. “First look, you look like Maureen L.”
Thankfully, the guy didn't mention that my boobs look nothing like hers.
According to: Some guy who commented on my feeling boldstar pictures on Friendster. I’m safely assuming he’s referring to Maureen Larazabal.
My reaction: Direk, I’m ready for my close-up!
4. “Posh Spice ito!”
This is a Gucci dress, y'all!
According to: Marmina, my old college buddy, who took note of my perpetual scowl and my taray demeanor, along with my sleek, pin-straight, chin-length hair. The former Victoria Adams used to wear her hair like that circa 1997.
My reaction: That I actually bear even a microbe of a resemblance to the woman David Beckham married and have freaky sex with like, everyday…well, as Miss Vicky herself would say, “It’s totally mayjah!”
Damn, I should sniff more books!
